Austin Quotes

Quotes and Quips

Out of the mouths of computer geeks... (Speak for yourself Ed!!! -kurt)

"The guilty dog speaks first" - Chris Ritchie
"2nd place is the first loser" - Chris Ritchie
"Never mess with a redneck" - Kurt McBride
"Lead, follow, or get the hell out of the way!" - Chris Ritchie
-Borrowed by the authors of Management for Dummies
"Yeah the API's are done, they're 25% tested" - Doug Mesler
"Yeah, I fixed it, but its still broken" - Kurt McBride
"What did I do to this thing?" - Jason DeLeau
"I did put it in there, but its not there" - Jason DeLeau
"Yeah, the build is generic if your machine is set up 'correctly'" - Jason DeLeau
"I'm a tool..." - Ron Harter to Kathi Mus
"If one person calls you an ass, ignore them. If 10 people say it start looking for a saddle."
"Anyone who declares themselves a 'master' of anything, ain't" - edited version, see Jay Gorrell for unabridged version
"Netscape is being bad" - Jason DeLeau 11:42 p.m. 2000
BAT - Kurt's truck
BAC² - Jason Deleau's twice broke car
"Nothing is often the right thing to do and most of the time the right thing to say" - Chris Ritchie
"They gave me 5 defects, but none of them are defects" - Jay Gorrell
"I opened it with priority and severity based on how I felt at the time" - anonymous
"There's nothing I can do about it, so it's not a defect" - Jay Gorrell
James Zhao shouts out a four letter explitive in correct context during a foosball game. He follows up with, "I don't know what that word means!" Nice try James! Dont pretend to be un-Americanized
"Who's the idiot that suggested we use Continuous?" - Ed Graham (master of inserting foot in mouth), during a meeting hosted by the very person (a VP, no less) - 7/1999
"Nevermind, I'll just wear a sports bra" - AsHeath, when prompted for input concerning career fair attire
"I screwed it up so bad that I just need to check it out again." - Jason Deleau
"Hacks are cool" - Kurt McBride
"Let me know when you are available tomorrow morning so I don't surprise everyone when I break everything." - Doug Mesler
"Uh-oh, did I just do something bad?" - Jason DeLeau
"This code fix really scares me, normally I'm inserting a hack, but this time I'm removing one." - Jason DeLeau
(In a tone of amazement) "Woah, it worked!" - Jason DeLeau
"He's a 3 finger, booger eatin', Moe-Rawn!" - Kevin McBride, of East Texas
"Do yall like to eat big nutts?" - Julie to Drew, Jay and Kurt
"Yes, Mike is evil . . . but I like it now." - Jodi Skwira (Fargo[0])
"I'm a Moe-Rawn" - Mike Grommet on the Foosball Table
"The low level design is in the code" - Nary
"You're being responsible about this!" - Angelica Vasquez (on a Tivoli vacation), to Kurt at JavaOne
"That's the way my skin hangs on my skull, buddy..." - Chris Ritchie
promethium: Broadcast message from critchie (ttyqb) Tue Jun 13 12:43:21 2000... URGENT: kyee please call Chris Ritchie @ 512.423.2936
"I hate it when I get scored on after a sarcastic remark" - AsHeath
"That's a fierce rubberman!" - Eric Lai
"This is gonna cause about a 1000 compile errors" - Jason DeLeau
"I'm handicapped today" - Lynne 'Test Monkey' Meddaugh
"Nuts are good" - AsHeath
"You're lucky you're a guy" - Lynne
"Stop eating boogers in front of me!" - Kurt McBride to Nary's friend during an interview.
"We're just joking with ya on the whole test_monkey thing, don't want you take any of this personal, you know how we are...." - Kurt's apology to Lynne (I scared him)
"This is a hack, but.. whatever" - Kurt on his coding efforts
"I'm a moron, just ignore me" - Kurt
"I may introduce a bug or two" - Jason DeLeau
"In order to perform my hack properly, I had to hack browser's makefile." - Jason DeLeau
"You'll have to explain that slower." - Jay Gorrell
"18. It was working yesterday." - He-Yin
"PT is my life." -> Lynne
"testing email crap..." - LM 1.5 test message from . . . Deepak!
"Has anyone ever told you you look like an owl?" Julie to Heath
"Well if you can't play foosball, at least you can talk $%#@" - Lynne
"We havent rebuilt with Jays changes (pause)... What am I trying to say?" - Drew-Bob Jensen
"Wow!, you're HUGE!" - Will Edwards (WebLogic Instructor) to Ed when asked how to define a string constant in Java.
"What does that mean?" - Jodi "Air-Head" Skwira in response to the word A-I-R in a Scrabble game.
"Maybe scratching your butt feels so good because you can't do it at work where people would think you're weird" - says Kurt to Jodi
"Let's scope it like we're gonna do it" - Jerry Hammack
"These men feel different" - Mike Grommet
"I dont like it with 3 men in the back, one is better" - Phil Dang
"This guy wants to join the ARTDG, the Associated Redneck Truck Dealer Group" - Byron Attridge
"Just shutup and take your beating like a man" - Jason DorkLeau to Kurt
"It was a straight angle shot" - Lynne
"In terms of development, I feel like I've been neutered" - Ed Graham when asked how he felt about his new Windows 2000 machine
"My right hand is busy, go away" - Jay Gorrell to Deepak
"If the progress bar stops for a long time and there is no disk activity, please restart your computer." - Windows 98
"This may take some time. Your screen may flicker during this process." - Windows 2000
"Nice Southern girls don't honk their horns . . ." - Sylvia Wallace, "No,they just silently give you the finger!" - Luke Walter
"I'll put a quote on chili if I get beat at pool by a GIRL!" Chris before Sylvia spanked him in a smokey Seattle pool hall
"I fixed it by unfixing the other fix." - Jason "HackMaster" Deleau
"You americans eat pain killers like candy!" - MIT (Eric Lai)
"I like delicate food." - Max
"Jason just doesn't have the MAD TESTING SKILLZ that seattle has!!" - Adam S, Seattle QA when I couldn't reproduce his bug
"Let's iron Eric's pants while he wears them!" - Ed Graham
"Man thats cool! You've even got the Indian guys cussing!" - Nick Davis
"Jason, you walk like an old lady!" - Jean Chen
"See Adam, AutoShow 2.3 isn't really an evil, soul-crushing application" - Sylvia
"Yes, I am a Moerawn" - Jodi Skwira
"I'm not stupid...... well, yes I am" - The WebMackster
"Max is wearing a condom." - AsHeath
"It's really hard to lick nuts" - Lynne
"Great thought poorly packaged gets you no where" - David Potts
In the context of EJB training ... "Do you developers know how to ... code" - Wendy Albee
"He is probably a victim from a long period of time doing management" - Eric Lai on an interview candidate
"Every time I bend over...[halt, cause Jay and Kurt go in to histarics]" - Ed Graham
"I don't have defects!" - Jason DeLeau
"A design is a lot of s#$%!" - Jay Gorrell
"I am so sorry about that and you have every right to call me every name in the book. I definitely owe you and Jay a beer. While I'm at it I might as well kiss your feet too. I know I'm never going to live this one down." - Lynne Medaugh, an apology for standing us up once again
"<high pitch>Squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeze!" - Eric Lai
"I LOVE Meetings!" - Mike-ron
"Don't touch my rod" - Max
"Change is the only constant. That which further differentiates folks is not their ability to adapt to the change but rather their ability to take advantage of it." - critchie-ism(11/00)
"It's hard to anticipate the moves of an erotic man like Jason" - Heath
"He Yin, are you ready for me?" - Jason "Daddy" DeLeau
"Jason reminds me of my dad." - Heath (Maybe he really is dating Jason's newly acquired daughter)
"When the decision has been made, it will be decided." - Mark Terry
"I gotta squeeze the monkey more often." - Kurt McBride
"I've always wanted to give you a hug!" - Bryan Benson to Ed Graham (who moved away very quickly)
"Jason's always right" -Lynne
"The primary product of a development team is not beautiful documents, world-class meetings, great slogans, or Pulitzer prize-winning lines of code." - UML User Guide
"Ed, You must be a manager" - Bill Cottrell(RUP instructor)
"Jay, Master of the Two-handed [high pitch]Squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeze!" - Ed, Kurt, Eric
"We need a hard, big slug of both" - Anna Hughes in reference to the need for a tactical and strategic product plan
"Look, Ed's got meat!" - Jay, after looking at Ed's driver license picture.
"duh, I know my color coordination" - Jason Versace
"Pat, stop that, you're hurting my manhood" - Kurt McAssWhooped
"Hey Ted, would you shove that right here for me" - Pat
"Send ALL the bugs to me." - Pat Von Beertoven
"That's impossible!" - He Yin's response to being told his bug fix introduced another defect.
"You already showed me your rubber ducky last night" - Sylvia - context withheld
"I just keep wacking myself under the table" - Dano - context withheld
"I like Pat playing in the back better, you never know where he's gonna put that thing" - Jay-Bird
"I know we're using an iterative development process, but here is a waterfall model requirements document for the entire media asset management system that I've been working on." - Anonymous Falcon Developer
"It was a strategic 3-finger goal!" - Mikey G. copping a CYA
"Please squeeze in a different direction." - Eric "Dr. SQUEEEEZE" Lai to Jay
"I think I had better get used to giving you the ball." - Jason "The Gimp" Deleau to Mikey
"I've decided that if I reproduce, it is going to be asexually." - Heath
"You put your mouth on it and blowit!" - Nedra
"Obviously we do offer a salary ..." - Julie Culin, to a candidate asking about compensation
"If you do it, I'll get in less trouble" - critchie, hoping someone else would enter the above Julie quote for him
"Hey Heath, I need you really really badly." - Mike Grommet, context withheld
"I haven't squeeezed much since you guys left." - Eric Lai
"I'll give [Jodi] a friendly poke when she gets back tomorrow." - Mike (Not Kurt) Grommet
"Pat is a power-house down there!!" --Mike Grommet, context withheld
"Chris, we can share those [suppositories]" -- Ron at his 75th
"I think I'm going to go up to Phil and say 'What was the latest puckerpoint and where can I apply the soooothing balm?'" --Heath, context unnecessary
"Jason has been giving me lap dances." - Deepak "Furry Gigolo" Goindwani
"Seattle is up my ass" - Nedra
"The couch monster's got me, but I still got the ball" - Nedra while on the floor
"Gonna make me some backwoods bombs, better hide dem' ovens!" - Grommet
"I'm a farm girl, my feet were always up in the air." - Nedra, context withheld
"I'm a backend person" - Deepak... pause... Bright Red Deepak
"Deepak, are you enjoying my backend?" -- SugaDaddy
"I was given Use "Less" Cases for I5." - Gloria Wang
"I just love Test Monkeys..." - Mike Grommet
"Nedra, do you want to do it with me?" -- Heath, context withheld
"Allright Big Daddy, Give me some of that Arkansas lov'n!" -- Kurt McMouth to Mike Grommet
"Sorry to interupt you, you can continue sucking up now." - Drew-Bob to Jason.
"I'm Jason and I'm a geek!" - Jason "Geek" Deleau introducing himself at Geeks Anonymous.
"I'm an army man. I like to carry stuff on my back. Hop on!" - G.I. Jodi to Mr. Tim Stiles.
"When you go for the slurp, you have to make sure that it's ready to come." - Pat Ludwig's oyster eating advice.
"Dammit!" - Pat Ludwig after realizing what he just said.
"My dog once humped me and I humped her back and she never did it again." - Stewart Bayless on animal behavior.
"It takes a man to have a boy!" - Critchie
"That's SLOP!" - Grommet at the foos table
"That's not slop, that's GEOMETRY" - Greg
"Yes He Yin, I will be the Product Manager for MAX." - Lil' Rajan
"Whoa, Bessie!" - Bubba Mike
"I choose to be a bottom of the barrell developer, this way I minimize the number of meetings I have to attend." - SugaDaddy
"I am a bob" - Mike-Bob admitting the obvious
"Size Does Matter" - mgrommet - context witheld
"Wasn't havin any luck scorin on Heath, so I figured I'd try you." - Ted to his goalie mgrommet.
"You can modify anything in cvs, just check it out and check it back in" - Shuga-Daddy (Isn't that profound!)
"With the flick of the wrist, the hopes and dreams of so many were crushed." - mgrommet opening mouth and speaking in chili.
"Marketing loves hacks!" - NedraBob
"I get lucky every now and then." - Farm Girl
"Think Latex, Woman!" - Kinky Mike to Nedra, context withheld
"I tend to 3-Finger things a lot" - Jason "3-Finger" Deleau
"I have a small brain!" - Jodi,
"I'm not going to use the line I used on Nedra on you" - Grommet to Sam
"Can I play with your ... slinky?" - Jodi
"There's been a lot of discussion about who's doing what, to who" - Ron "BigCheese" Harter
"I prefer goat balls" - Nedra "Farm Girl" Bray
"After I get a 1-900 call, I reach over and grab Eric" - Ed
"The straight way wasn't working for me" - Jay
"Damn it, I can't wack him off!" - kmohr while playing with his computer
"It looks like there is something protruding from your shorts." - Lil' Rajan to McMouth
"I am a defect resolving (inserting?) fool!" - Jason
"I suck, and he was there." - Heath
"Nary, You know what goes on in prison. Is that humorous in India?" - Heath "Well, you do that all through college" - Lil' Rajan
"Bitch, I'm gonna give you nightmares." - Mike "Pimp-Daddy" Grommett
"All the people that work on the second floor are rejects." - Jason
"There's a train coming and he needs to either get on it or get out of the way." - Phil-bert discussing our movement to Java
"9 women can't make a baby in a month" - Sameer during a Falcon delivery discussion
"Heath, you get to ride on top." - Mike Grommet layin out the lunch delivery plans
"I guarantee you, all my parts are boy parts." - Roscoe
"That's not a non-zero amount of work." - Jimmy Jarrett
"My use cases have little stick figures with pointy things sticking out of them." - Heath(er)
"Can one of you guys do me the honors and put this in the apropriate place" - Nedra
"I'll manage my people, thank you very much!" Lynne 'Sue Bob' Meddaugh
"Lynne, could you come and play with me" - Marilyn
"How does Nedra like her meat?" - Curious Jay
"I'm sorry for poking you Heath." - Julie Sohn
"I gotta a whole lotta stuff that swings." - Jay "Mr. Tact" Gorrell when asked to go swing dancing
"Jason, I miss having more touch points with you" - Critchie
"Come be cleansed at the temple of foose" - Jason
"Julie whipped the Crack!" - Murthy-Bob
"Guys can teach girls sh#@, but girls can't teach guys sh#@" - Heath
"I'd be a good horizontal PM. I like to lay down on my back." - Stuart Bayless
"There's nothing like a cheap $20 ho!" Mikey to his wifey.
"Who's gonna do it with me?" - Nedra
"I will" - J. So (in response to Nedra's query).
"I like practicing with the other guy." - Jaypak
"[Theres a] lotta meat on that boy" - Kevin "Da Carivore" Walter, referring to Yung Follis (context withheld)
"Trey has a 6ft rocket, but we haven't set it off yet" - Nedra
"Its like when He plays with me, he plays down on me" - Kurt MohrBob
"Jason is my sweetie!" - Deepak (I bet his wife didnt know she had to share)
"I didn't even think to look online" -Lynne, looking for the address of a Subaru dealer as she shops for her next car.
"Of course they skipped the rest of the sentence. I was looking for an address." - Lynne, when teased about the above quote
"God, I wish I had another nooner" - JuliBob, context withheld
"Yung, stop it! Nedra is the ball chaser" - Jodi knows all
"Not to interrupt, but...... I am" - Alan Stalcup
"I wonder if Mike does any other farm animals?" - Julie Culin
"Mike, do you do any other small farm animals?" - Kurt McMouth, "No, just chickens" - Grommet
"Ah, my thingy locked up." - Heath
"Well, we've got better tools to fool around with." - Ed Graham
"I was going after my ball and it slipped out" -- Kurt "smooth hand" McBride
"I Guess I could be a chicken ho for $50" The always eloquent Grommet
"Am I muted?" unknown dumbass on company meeting phone conference
"I've got a short one, Ron" - Critchie
"There's a beauty to having actual mechanical devices" --Julie Sohn
"I like meat... ON MY PIZZA!!!!" - Tracy Sudduth
"Hey Nary, you look GREAT from behind..." - Kurt MohrBob
"I suck at the front thingy" -Heath Malstrom
Mike "Kinky Yoda" Grommet: "Feel the force, feel it flow through you..."
Chauffer Jay: "Dammit Mike you can't sit behind me anymore!"
"I haven't played with the small one in [pause]" - bright red Jimmy Jarrett
"Because we're cool and they're not" - Jeff D. on why MAX is better than the competition
"I would say I have my thingy over here..." - Smooth Chris Ritchie
"My right hand gets more practice than my left" - Lynne Meddaugh
"It's a moral dilemma, but I don't have any morals" - Kevin Walter
"I should get the guys at Golfsmith to show me their thingies" Jodi's guide to Golf
"You squished my widgets!" - Tracy Sudduth
"Did you just 'Bob' something?" - Ed Graham to Keith Burns
"Can you handle these big balls" - Nary to Kurt
"You are aesthetically pleasing" - Steve Dallas to Gerald
"How big are you?" - Ron Harter
"I didn't do it, unless I was supposed to." - Tracy Sudduth
"I was just trying to get it in!" - JP
"OK Spaz, just slam it in there" - Pat Ludwig to Mike 'Spaz' Grommet
"So, here are some simple rules (with credit to Chris Ritchie) we could all follow to spend less time in meetings" - John Holt, commenting on critchie's love for meeting etiquette
"Jay, I'm in need of your services" Julie S.
"I used to score a lot, but I haven't in weeks." - J-so commenting on how one's foozing skill wanes when you don't practice (with others).
"I'm always chewing on Nary's ass", Kurt "Knaw-boy" McBride
"Jump her as soon as she gets out of the meeting" - Phil Dang-Bob
"I have a short stick" Alan Stalcup
"I've been offered all over the place, I've just never accepted." - Awww yeah, hmalmstr gets around.
"Let's go see `Deliverance' because Mike Grommet is always squealing like a pig." - j-so's questionable film selection criteria.
"I left him a voicemail, an e-mail, I even made fun of his parents and he still won't call me back !" - Wade Siefert describing his smooth sales prowess
"Show me yours and I'll show you mine..." - Tom Winans (Warburg) to Ted
Ron: "Chris, I am just like a woman" - 6/20/01
"I'm cluster-phobic" - Mike Grommet
"Unless they prove otherwise, they're boneheads" - Stuart Bayless
"Sorry Jodi, I had my finger in yours." - Mr. Tact Gorrell
Would you like to dance? - Mike Grommet to a random man in the hallway
"Houston? Hmm, isnt there a space center there somewhere? -- Jason
"I'm the backend, Jason is the frontend" - Deepak talking about his "sweetie"
Invalid Petal File - Rational Rose warning message
"Everyone is a woman deep down inside" Julie Sohn
"Wait till Nedra does it to you" - Jay
"I did 6 cats in one house once." -- Trey, Nedra's soon to be hubby
"Keep it stupid" Tracy 'A I' Sudduth
"I like the hard ones the best" - Yung Follis
Ewwww . . . Stop sliming me ! -- Jodi Skwira, context unknown
We were on our knees . . . that's what girls do. - Nedra
"Something I don't write is right" --- Steven Vaughan
"I like that in a guy - cheap and easy." - Nedra
"We suck either way" - Jodi & Nedra
"You know, a monkey can make you money." - Heath Malmstrom
"Is there a difference between girls and guys?", Phil Dang
"Ted and I have something on the side" - The Gromminator
"I have an apple for lunch; it isn't much, but it's better than dying because I'm fat" - Jay Gorrell
"Its a nice size, not too big, not too small..." Jean-Pierre context withheld
"Do you guys have anything long?" - Heath
"Yes!!" - Everybody in foos room
"Have you ever eaten one of their larges. Fourteen inches of love." --Hawk
"When one developer gets laid, we all celebrate." - anonymous cheeky developer
"Bend it back and put it in" - Ed Bob
"I can do it faster myself" - Ed Bob
"umm...what were we thinking?" JP 'on the ball' Louis
"He's this guy that rides around on a bicycle in a bikini: Best lookin' dude I ever saw" --Chris Ritchie
"You wanna chest butt, sis?" -Luke Walter "Sure bro, if you wanna pile-drive me!" -Sylvia Wallace
"I get f***ed from every angle" - Andy Largent
"What's your preference, top or bottom?" - Dan Marquette
"I have no talent of any sort" - MohrBobKurt
"Are you having problems getting it up?" Gracefull Jodi to Travis - context withheld
"Getting lucky is a good thing" - Kurt McMouth, "Yep" - Jodi
"Ding dongs were a dollar!" JPL
"I'm just going to start whacking it" - frustrated Tedd
"Is your sausage hiding under there?" -Tedd to his boss
"Sometimes I get lucky..." - MohrBobKurt
"I've been wanting to get a pair" JP
"Its going to start growing faster!" JP 'the man' Louis
"I wasn't planning on testing it" -JP
I couldn't pull out, I was frustrated - Mike Grommet
18 inches is a good thing - Jodi
"Back then, if you put it in front of me, I would eat it." - Mike Grommet
"Heath is just a very unattractive woman" - Julie Sohn
"Go for it, I know you want it" Heath to Jimmy"
"Just keep beating it until it goes in" - MohrBobKurt
"What's Nedra doing on her knees?" - Yung Follis
"I am not skilled at receiving your passes." - Pat L. to J.P. Louis
"It's not broken, it just won't compile" - MohrBobKurt
"This is a mystery wrapped in a riddle inside an enigma" Phil 'guru' Dang
"You want me to get off so you can get on." -Ryan to Yung
"I'm going to set my girlfriend on you, so you better watch your back..."...Haneef to Lynne after she called him a wimp.
"I'll take all the Narys I can get" - Needy Nedra
"Spec questions must be directed to me in the future so I can look at how I already wrote it and inform you that is the way its supposed to be" - JasonBob
"Jodi, are you cheap?" - Mike Grommet
"If anyone starts scorin, I'm gonna slam 'em" - Kurt "The Hammer" Mohr
"I need to learn some more strokes." - Heath
"I need to schedule some meetings to get out of coding today" - KurtMohrBob
"I have three layers of protection." - Murthy
"Everyone has a hole." - Murthy
"I've got the balls right here in my hand." - Mikey
"Hey, dork! Why do you take the balls with you when you leave?" - Heath-master
"It's not like I know anything, but I still answer questions." - Jason Deleau
"Deepak scores better after he's been petted." - MohrBobKurt
"I was going to compliment you on your rod control..." - MikeyMike to the Heathster
"grab me" Alan Stalcup
"It's not up yet!"- Kim Meyer in frustration
Jay are you ready for me? -- Murthy
I am always ready for you -- Jay
"Let me know if there is anything I need to keep my hands off of." - Kim Meyer
"I can't be flawless all the time!" - JP "Master of the Obvious" Louis
"Craig, you make me very happy." - kurt mohrBob
"this whole asking permission is crap" pat 'crap' ludwig
"It doesn't get any bigger than that, so stop trying. Funny how often I have to say that." - Hawk to Jodi
"I can't fit the whole thing in my face" Greg "open wide" Foster
"keep your hand in your pants" - Deepak
"You scare me when you do that dude" - Heath to Greg, context withheld
"That freaked me out, it was buzzing in my pants..." - J.P.'s electronic devices are always on vibrate mode.
"I want to tie Nary up." - Eric Lai
"Spank me baby!" - Matt Semar to Cuong
"Thank goodness, I was wondering when I would finally say something worthy of that list...", Matt Semar on Chili Quotes
"You suck so bad, I have to give it to you again!" - MohrKurt to JP
"I swell up and get nasty" - Heath
"I think it would've been ok if Nedra hadn't blown on it" -- mgrommet
"That's stupider than a Grommet" - Jay
"I haven't choked it today." - Choke-O-Rama
"We need to talk about a defect honey..." - Jodi to Steve Dallas while tickling his ear
"Nothing compares to being frenched by a dog" - Jay Gorrell
"If it ends with an ass, I can do it!" - Confident Jay
"aim4nary: thks for calling motorplaceautoexchange, how may i help today ?" - Lil' Rajan
"Who needs a toy????" - Jodi
"Jay, slow down! You're doing it to fast!" - Greg Foster
"Nobody ever accused me of being too fast before..." - Jay Gorrell
"I'll be over here playing with myself" - Solitary Nedra
"I'm not a Presbyterian, but I've got a Long Island iced tea." - Bobby Stevens, handing a questioning passerby a cold one
"If I keep doing that, pretty soon the napkin will stick to my lap" - gfoster
"I'd love to be a fawning toadie!" - Jim Frentress
"It's different if someone beats you as opposed to beating yourself." - Jim Frentress
"We definetly need to get a line of communication open so we can assess Cobalt impact." - Grommett-Bobby
"You definitely want to examine your tool" Josh Week
"Feel the power of the Spaz flow through you" - Mike "Spaz" Grommet
"Hey, I may like my music funky but not my mouth!" - Bart Landry
"Since mine is significantly large" Kurt Mohr
"Actually, Ron does have really nice legs!" - Julie Sohn
Inquiring about Sylvia: "Is She Fixed??" -- NedraBob
"Watch out where you point that thing!" -- McMouth to Jay
I exposed myself to my neighbor! - Mike "the flasher" Grommet
"Nedra, we have to score!" - Greg, "I know" - Nedra
"You have to leverege your resources in the way it seems most efficient" - Jason-Bob
"Jay Gorrell: It worked last time I touched it"
"That's not something you see very often, Mike scoring on Pat like that" random chili quote generator
"All's fair in love and chili quotes." - Mike Grommet
"If you feel that bad for her, you can slip something in" Pat Ludwig
KurtMcMouth: yeah, big bummer, she is a good QA person, and one of the easiest QA people that Ive worked with
"Ok ^%$#, I can't get back in, that's annoying" - MohrKurt
"Which end of the dog is this?" - Julie Sohn
"You kiss a guy and you wont kiss a dog?" - Mike to Heath
"Makes me want to play with my slinky." Phil "guru" Dang
"Forgetting my shirt was better than the time I forgot all of my clothes." - Nedra
"WebManager has defeated me, I give up, I surrender..." - jplouis
"Pat, you better be glad I suck" Kurt Mohr
"I had touched it, but only in a certain section" - Jean-Pierre
"I saw him playing with it, and I had to play with it too" - Nedra, again
"I played with myself earlier" -MohrKurt
"You make a complete mess of yourself, trying to hold this slimey thing" Pat "Slimey" Ludwig
"Are we supposed to have a room, or should we just stand here" - More Kurt
"okay, i obviously suck at this. go ahead and put that on chili if you want." NedraBob
"it looks so small when its wrapped!" - JeanPierre talking about his 'burrito'
"I know what you want before you want it" Jason 'whos your daddy' to Deepak
"The doctor said everything is where it's supposed to be, so...." - JP
"The best code review is to put it out there and see what breaks" - Anon.Y Mouse
"dotkimtx: we're ready for our log lesson" - Kim Meyer to McMouth
"I can't eat those, they're too hard!" - Angela Kudrick
"Thats just a true fact." - Grommet (as opposed to an untrue fact?)
"I'm not proud of it. I just pinched it." - Mikey strkies again
Brian Worsham: "It's clear that libraries do not have IDS, only names." McMouth: "Those strings (for libs and folders) are indeed unique Identifiers. They are not merely names." Brian Worsham: "Dude, try reading what I wrote, not what you think I said. I never said it was "merely" a name."
"If I'd hit it harder, it would have gone in." - Jason Deleau
"they're huge" said Angela. "Angela, you have a problem with big things, don't you?" asked Lynne "Don't be shy, honey" Deepak
"Jason, do you like the front or the back." - ArkaBubba
"This is Kurt's String, does it work when you insert it" Elaine Harman
"Alan was gentle with me." - Michael Hartzog
"Mike's gone into Perma-Pucker" - MohrKurt
"That's the Nary I know and love!" - mgrommet (No chickens were available)
"Give us all the clap there, Hawk" - Matt Horton
"Sometimes guys just need to be with other men." - Julie Sohn
"You have a strange sensation for that stuffed woman" - Grommet to McMouth
"I'll suck as many good people as I can" - Yung 'The Vacuum' Follis
"Kurt's always playing with himself when he's not with you guys" - Phil Sims
"I'm trying to be easier today" Sylvia
"What sizes do you have...as far as inches?" J-So
Compared to that, my 51 incher is nothing -- Craig, comparing his "tube?"
"He was falling out of his chair, he wanted me so badly." Rob Casanova
"I'll show you mine tomorrow" - Jay Gorrell
"Oh my god, it just came up!" Elaine Harman
"You suck, you completely suck!" Elaine Harman
"I'll bring you down some when I come" Elaine Harman
"We can do it together" Elaine Harman to kurtm
"I like the way he was puckering." - Ted complimenting J.P.'s excitability.
"There were too many guys; don't really need 5" - Nedra
"Don't try and find problems, that's QA's job" - JP
"I can see myself bending over and getting a big ball in my face" James Green
"I'm a man's dream - Alyson Sharron"
It's not a hack, it's a solution - Deepak Bob
"I can be an ass in the abstract sense" - JP Louis
"Deepak, it was a wonderful experience staying here with you until almost midnight." Beth (LM project manager)
"it's less labor for me, I didn't have to get on my hands and knees" gfoster
" if( from > to ){ from = to; };
if( to < from ){ to = from; }; " Greg 'I need some coffee' Foster
"Managers can come by and smell me" Greg Deodorant Foster
"She's still sore from last week, don't do that!" Craig talking about Nedra, see #403
"I know ... but I don't put things in my mouth that don't taste good" Elaine Harman, context unknown
"Asha's got apples!" - critchie
"those of you who are actually down in Austin of course... you can use the hands-on approach" - Elaine 'hands on' Harman
"I always try JP after I try Kurt" Elaine Harmann
"That's not a quote, you enter it I kill you" Elaine Harman
"I don't have any panties to bundle." - Jodi Skwira (blushing)
"just dont f**k up anything" Ron on code changes
"I am being managerial!" Elaine Again
"The voices in my head have no musical ability." -Kurt Mohr
"He's more likely to swallow it from Bobby" - The Seattle chili quote generator talking about her boss
"I was thinking in terms of scoring" - The SCQG again
"Her crotch was pretty much right in my face." - Elaine "Seattle's Answer to Nedra" Harman
"I don't need to take that point against Deepak; Maybe if I was playing against a clone of myself..." - Jason DeLeau
"Greg was rather envious, his monster was not quite the size" Pat Ludwig
"Are you two [Kurt Mohr and Greg Foster] related" - Asha
"I heard moaning and groaning" Pat to SCQG
"It's been a long time since I stuffed you" - DorkLeau to McMouth
"That was pretty 3-fingered, but that's just the way I am" - Jason (of course)
"I may have to take you..." - Jean-Pierre to the SCQG
"I was too busy looking at Deepak" - Jason DeLeau
She's here with me, we're about to go to a room (Deepak on the phone speaking about lynne)
"Deepak's gone, I can play now." - Jason to critchie, after hours
"Jasmine, why are you screwing my man?" spam of the day
"This is the only way we can get the QA reports to reflect the correct most current state of the state." - Sameer Bob
"In any case, the changes youre gonna make to library retrieval, will be like Preparation H to hemmhroids." - Kurt "McMouth" McBride
"Deepak! Manage me!" - Jason
"Just because you're used to it, doesn't mean its fun" - Jason
Jay Gorrell: A persons ability to be a pain in the ass is inveresly related to the amount of real work they do
"A little softer next time..." - Kurt McBride instructing Mikey
"your smart-ass-o-meter seems to be pegged lately" critchie 'the god"
"I'm not going to shoot the snake for a while" JP the snake charmer
"I like the miniture ones, you don't notice them, you're just popping them into your mouth" - Jean-Pierre
"Dude I scored! I scored at McDonald's!" -Jules Doyle, context withheld
"I can swallow now, I'm happy" Keith Burns
"txcrackers: up yers - I'm experimenting" - Ed Graham
"Keep you hands out of the player until you drop the ball" - Jean P.
"Numbers in (parathensis) are delta from last yesterday." - Mark Moore
"Take it easy on me, I haven't done this in two weeks" - The Original Chili Quote Generator
"It's sad that community jealousies are keeping Deepak and Kurt apart." - Julie Sohn on the breakup of the happy couple
"Come by and smell me anytime. Just not tomorrow." - The ever fragrant gfoster
"Can I put 'Pucker B*tch' as my official position on my resume?" - Anonymous Laughing Geek
"You know you type like a dork." -critchie to Jason "You know, I am a dork". -Jason
"Are you playing with yourself JP?" - Critchie
"A burning hand is worth two in the tree" -- Greg "What in the heck am I talking about?" Foster
"I do it more than you'd think" - Jason "Lucky" Deleau
"That shows I can play both ways" Nary
"How many beans you whackin on?" Ed Graham
"My love for you can not grow any more" Pat 'the lover' to Mohr Kurt
"I cant handle these big balls." - Hawk
"I want to play with Glen" - Ryan Green
"You were pretty consistent on me" - Nedra
"It never does matter, cause I'm not scoring any" - Nedra
"You put it in there, now can you pull it out?" -- J. Sohn to Greg "the man"
"Don't ever swallow" Craig
"Swallowing bad" kmohr
"I've looked for good 'things', I just didn't find any" - JP Louis
"Just grab me when you're ready" Lee "Rock Star" Brown
"Don't worry, you can put it in the other end, it still counts" Nedra "either end" Bray
"It's amazing I don't score on myself more often." Greg "the man"
"That makes me hot, but thats a whole 'nother story" - Phil "Mr. 1-900" Dang while on the phone
"I only have one crotchfruit." - More phone sex comments from Phil Dang
"Kiss my ass" - Jason "Okay, pull down your pants" - Deepak
"Increasing-Sexual-Potency-Frequency" Cobalt spam of the day
"Come on baby, I didn't think I could get anything in there..." Lynne on the foosball table
"I need more men" - Nedra
"So I just need to find the studs and nail them." - Julie "Find Me a Hammer" Sohn
"I only pull it out on special occasions" Jean Pierre
"Some of us have a tool, some of us don't" - Ed
"He pulled it out!!" - An excited Tedd talking about JP
"I can't be in same room with your wife, because we may get into a fight over you." - Jason to Deepak
"Just cram it in there Mike!" - McMouth
"I haven't started it yet, but it's looking good." - Sean Ayles
"At that point, yer kinda in a funky place" - MohrKurt
"especially when it winds up coming out of my mouth!" Nedra
"It's like a snowball's hell in chance..." - Julie "Stop it, you're making me sound like an immigrant!" Sohn
"This is NOT the broad I wanted, but it'll do..." -Miz Tyler
"Get your butt down!" -Ron Harter, to Elaine
"....watch my butt." -Ron to Elaine, a few minutes later.
"make some deposits in the sleep bank" Rajan 'the inspiration leader'
"I wanted the smaller one cause it would be easier for me to handle" - Julie Sohn
"I used to beat on my ear and it didn't do any good." - Julie "Quote Generator" Sohn
"SEXY TEENS (FREE FOR LIFE) " Cobalt spam of the day
"Garrett does it all day long and I tried for 3 days and I can't do it" - Angela Kudrick
"Jason, do you mind if I call you 'J. Leau' [pronounced J. Lo]?" - Cuong
"I was afraid to take my hands off my rods!" - mgrommet
"I scored like that on myself yesterday" - Craig "Old Reliable" Miller
"its a intricately, delicately tangled piece of s**t" - the frusterated developer
"...take it like a man and split it down the middle." - Andy Largent
"Don't jump on me like that Deepak" - Little Rajan
"You should play with me more often" - Dennis T to Tori
"Ted prefers D**K (Richard)" Nedra the gossip queen
"I don't want to score, I just want to make Nedra make noise" G Foster
"Continuus needs to add a 'Bite Me' button" - Elaine Harman
"I'm just a girl that can't say no." Sylvia "yes girl" Wallace
"Wait! I was flexing!" - Critchie
"You're about the funniest partner I've ever had" - Ryan to Chris Ritchie
"Oh my god! He screams like a woman!" - Julie Sohn about Critchie
"I guess I should take my clothes with me!" Nedra, of course.
"It's medium size, matte finish, stainless" - Angela Kudrick
"You prolly like the smaller the better, but not me." - Lil' Rajan
"I'm taking the balls." - MohrKurt
"Once I get a little piece, I can't stop eating it!" Jean-Pierre
Other teams need Head... Kurt McBride
"I never get it at home" Ron
"I try to make it hard for you also" Ed the great
"I even touched it and it didn't help!" - Mike "hands-on" Grommet
"A couple of us are gonna get jerked [pause] Damnit Kurt, I didn't say off" - critchie
"Who's smoking it?" - Ron "Free Love" Harter to the falcon lists.
"This thing is too small." - Dennis Thomas
"I tried it hard and I tried it soft, it's not working." - Dennis Thomas
"I was afraid to touch it! - Nedra
"See, if you've been away from it for a week, you loose your numbness to it" - Nedra Bray
"aim4nary: i'm leavin with craig" - Nary
"I remember waking up, and it was 6 o'clock, and I was under the sink." --Craig Miller
"Play foosball, play with yourselves I don't care! Just don't touch your keyboards" - MohrBob
"Do you actually get some?" -- Daniel Nelson to Critchie
"Do you want to do a three way?" - Julie 'the more the merrier' Sohn
"We got a group banging on it" -- Ed "Bang Bang" Graham
"I'm gonna have fun in the kingsize bed myself" - Marie Ludwig
"I have a hard enough time keeping up with me" - Jay
"Sushi has it, the toe and hand" - Nedra
"I'm trying to reproduce, but I can't get that far anymore." MohrKurt
"I just got off a plane, I don't know where my head is." - critchie
"Your crotch is doing something crazy." - Jodi to Kurt Mc
"Nedra's got the biggest one I've seen." - Greg "context-witheld" Foster
"My jerky is never the same twice." - mgrommet in reference to his meat processing skills.
"Be careful swallowing that" - Mary to Nedra
"Its been a while since I went down" - Trey
"Mouth closed, and that's still going in" Tedd
"I hate them. I hate them all!" -- Sylvia Wallace
"I need PT for my bunghole" -- Greg "Bugholio" Foster
"Change is EVIL." -- Ron 'I am flexible' Harter
"I'm tryin to do an armadillo..." - Grommet starting another Arkansas story?
"Open your mouth and get frenched" Jay to Craig
"I didn't enjoy it, I just opened my mouth" Jay 'say ahh' Gorrell
"I've got a banana in my hand." - Nedra, context withheld
"My relationship with you is...unquestionable, Jason." --Deepak
i had to get the airport guys to come over and jump me, which they must do often because they have like a 50' cable...
"It's what a version 1 should be.... which is hack-o-licious." -peterp
"Where's your balls?" - James Zhao
"I'd rather play with Nedra" Ted "playtime" Douglass
"I was laughing at Greg's little funky stuff" - mgrommet
"I can pull it out for you, JP." - Pat Ludwig
"Whip it out of there and put it in here, it will be happy" - Anita Tyler
"6 inches just aint enough" Jean-Pierre Louis
"You're not as good as Nedra, but you are entertaining" - Greg to Jay
"Over-indulgence makes me kind of shaky" - Cuong Nguyen
"Did you get a room" Dennis Bob to Phil
"Pretty soon, everyone will be bangin' on head." - Chris "Supafly" Ritchie
"I like to sweat" - MohrBob
"I will wipe it myself" Pat "Mr. Clean" Ludwig
"My hand slipped off the stupid thing" JP "sure hands" Louis
Deepak to Jason (very sweetly): "Hey sweetie, do you want to go play?"
"I think you're rubbin off on someone!" - Bubba to J-gor
"Don't ever say that again." - Jgor immediately afterwards.
"If you tell me to screw you, then I'll screw you!" - Bubba "Special Sauce" McBride
"Mike, thanks for wiping up my spit" - Greg Focker
"This ball is smaller than the ones im used to." - Little Rajan
"Dammit, I knew that ball was headed for trouble." - Nedra "Hindsight is 20-20" Bray
"take that and shove it up my a**, it would probably feel better!" - frustrated pat
"What are you doing on your wedding night? " JulieS. asking NedraB.
"I look at Nary as a girlfriend, not a boyfriend" - Geek Deleau
"Ideally, I would have pinched it and stopped it" - Ted "Clench" Douglass
"Show me your man(m) thing" - Ted to Greg.
"Ted, put your hand down here" - Lonely MohrBob
"you want poofy? I can show you poofy!" nedra 'poof'
"I have nothing in my head." - CRitchie
I don't mind paying for it.-- Jay "Mr. Generous" Gorrell
"We won't get warm until you beat us..." - Glenn "all about the foreplay" Carnagey
"I could give you some money, what you gonna give me for it?" nedra to pimp daddy ted
"I can't see without touching it" 'Hands on' Nedra
"It would be funner if it lasted longer." - Mike "Dr. Ruth" Grommet
"Where did you stick it!" - Jay
"Thats not where I asked you to stick it!" - Jay
"Stick it somewhere where I can reach it." - Jay "Sticky" Gorrell
"I don't seem to bond well with animals, it's amazing I bond with Heath." Julie "engaged" Sohn
"The trick is to do it all in one smooth motion" -Jim Frentress
"We are already contacting dealers that we will contact them in the morning" - ?????
"Just because you're on Jason's team doesn't mean you have to flail around with the guys" - JP's advice to MohrBob
"Vidhya is biting my ass" - Rama Nittala
"They exchange body fluids" - Response from Rick Matthews when someone asked about MAXonline.org (www.maxonline.org)
"Some get it sometimes, some get it all the time" - Ron Harter
"I think I am hung!" Mike Hartzog during Nitra load testing
"I get off easier than Greg did" - Mike 'Easy Off' Grommet
"I am a 3 finger" - Jason Deleau
"I keep giving it to ya becuse you suck so bad" - Critchie(the giver) to JP(the receiver)
"thank you for doo(m)ing me" Mike to JP
"Phil has a very tight..." Observative Nedra-bob
"There is some jalepeno cheese dip in the kitchen I plan on being really bad with later" Nedra "bad girl" Bray
I was mesmerized by Kurt's tits-Jason
"Wasn't Mike going to buy new balls?" - Enquiring Ted wants to know
"Where you gonna stick it?" = Jay Gorrell
"Let me know when you want to get on this thing" - McMouth to Grommet
"You are henceforth allowed to blow it off." - Peter "Mr. Beneficent" Ponomarev
"I'm going to go blow my nose then eat something" - Julie "dinner is served" Sohn
"I think if you eat too many nuts, especially the salty ones..." PhilBob Dang
"Is this your banana? Can I play with it?" - Good Ol' Critchie
"I think I'd be nice too if I was trying to give some guy the shaft." - Mike "Bubba" Grommet
Thank you so much, your highness, for deigning to acknowledge my presence, much less accede to my simpleton's request. As always, i grovel at thy feet and pick up the crumbs of HTML/JavaScript goodness that foolishly leap from thine lips and savor them as succulent meals unto themselves. - Greg "The Foppish Bard" Foster unto Elaine "Queen of SubWay" Harman
"Business E View Website Bundles - inconsistent butt" - Mark Moore's PT report
"Nobody could kiss the ladies like Dick could." - Nedra "causin' a Family Feud" Bray
"When there's 10-20 pairs of pants to go through, you just take em off and go for it!" - Nedra "Trouser Browser" Bray
"Heath looks so cute when he's blowing on it." J-So
"I think I see a Funky Butt !" - RSH when walking behind two attractive Cobaltians in the French Quarter
"Are we gonna get a room or something?" - Nedra Bray to Mike Grommet
"My wife is big on THE END" - Brian "Radio Commentary" Worsham
"I don't do bed wetters" - Jay "has standards" Gorrell
"Here is the tool. Explanation follows." - Stefan
"If I can show my dirty underwear, you can show yours" Ed 'laundry boy' Graham
"Come do a huddle with me." - Chris "reach out and touch someone" Ritchie to Stefan "this isn't in my contract" Piesche
"I keep sticking it in, but it pops back out." - Nedra Bray
I've got sore places on my body. -- Chris Ritchie
"I am feeling really exposed at the moment" the infamous critchie
"Stop playing with the ball and put it in the hole." - Grommet
"We're naked and hungry" Michael Hartzog on the state of Program Management
"You've already exposed yourself?" "Yes, fully." - Ed the Mouth asked and Rajan responded
"Kevin? Kevin? Who's Doughnut Boy? Oh Keith" - Dan (instructor) during the TogetherJ class.
"I have a small one, Kurt" Ed, the small
"I mean, not that I would mind all that much, you do have a nice ass" - Hawk to Jason
"You've played with it before. I mean you play with it a lot." - Craig Miller
"I don't care how fast you go, I'm still keeping my eyes closed" - Greg "See no evil" Foster to JP
"Stick it where?" - Sparky McBride
"It yanks it hard!" - Instructor Dan
"I'll tell you where to stick that" - Instructor Dan
What's your room number - Dan Hale Room 206 - Beth Glander - I'll bring the wine - Dan Hale
I guess I just have a dirty mind - Beth Burks
"Mike and I've got a nooner with Anita. It should be a quick one." - Kurt "Out to Munch" McBride
"I suspect it would work allright. But that's just a suspection." - Jay "Sureluck Holmes" Gorrell
"Broussard98: EX-5 had dual pipes, so I was screwed no matter what." - Brian Broussard
"If you sacrifice a chicken, the chances go up" - Jason Deleau
"I've learned a lot since I wrote that" - Jason referring to Autoshow
"You were there and the ball was in my hand." - Rajanito
"Don't take Nary, he's working on my back end." - Jason "bug monkey" D'Low
"Once its in there we don't do anything with it" - JP
"snyk01: considering i am multitasking...with you pokin every 2 min..its pretty damn fast" - Sameer to Kurt
"The wheelchair makes the pole thing hard." - Heath "Standard Deviation" Malmstrom
"I cant believe I got that up!" - Dennis Thomas
"Don't say choke when I'm releasing!" - Critchie
"Always feel free to take credit for anything I did if it means I dont have to have contact with an individual" - Jason (perhaps not worthy of a chili quote, but still funny)
"Why have chicken when you can have beef?" - Mike "Chickie Heartbreaker" Grommet
"... but it's all soft and squooshy.... it's like having your very own long breast" - Wade "Is Never Touching My Wrist-Rest Again" Matveyenko
"I was ready for it too! I had my fingers in my ears and everything!" - Nedra "Boy Scout" Bray
"jdeleau1: Ok maybe I have bubba potential that is as far as I'm willing to admit" - Jason, with his broke down car in the driveway, pickup truck, and live in family
"and then we can whip them out on the table and compare them" - Pat 'size that counts' Ludwig
"Yes, it is time for fisting." - Pat "I will RULE you!" Ludwig gathering the cannon fodder for another round of FOOZ.
"I went up and then down, but it just wouldn't work!" Christy Baca describing the failed motions to Dennis
"I'm offering the pleasure of my company" - Kurt Mohr
"He should keep it on the table so he has easy access." - Pat Ludwig on Mike Grommet's handheld appliance.
"I always do good at the strip club." - Jay "Fistful of Dollars" Gorrell
"Jay needs a strapon his roof" - MohrBob the annoyed
"Sticking it to your brother is ok." - Jay "Family Love" Gorrell
"It was worse than sticking it to chickens" - grommet
"It's just not long enough" - Julie Sohn
"Hey Mark, Why don't you cycle your unit?" - Mike Hartzog
"Ouch! That pokey thing got me in the back." - Geek Deleau
"I don't get requirements, I just start coding" - Jason Deleau
"Feel the presence of the ball..." - JP "Yoda" Louis
"Does that mean Mike is going to eat us later?" - Greg "Arachnophobia" Foster
"You can't turn me down! How many times do I initiate it?" - Needy Nedra
"I love picking out one guy and then just nailing him the whole time..." - Hawk
Are we gonna do that thing on the wall? Craig Miller
"pants weren't working for me" - Nedra (of course)
"It's so big that it doesn't fit anymore!" - Amazed critchie
"You're gonna be nailing everything in sight." Nedra to McMouth
"Give me that back meat, baby" - Mike "don't turn around" Grommet
"I wonder what the geek women look like" - Julie "Hasn't looked in a mirror" Sohn
That's what happens when you do not meet the deadline -- Matt Horton on Chris Ritchie's beaten up face
"And before you get the runs...[hehehehe]" - Jay
"Caroline is always pulling my chestnuts out of the fire." PhilBob Dang
"The stuff JP did fixed me." - Mikey, who obviously needed fixin'
"I had him right where I wanted him...but it was the wrong angle." - Pat "Bent Geometry" Ludwig
I'm not that good with my left ha... - Lynne suddenly realizing she should shut up
I was reading my own code, and I thought.. God.. what a mess! - Alan Sinton
"We need to find a chicken, put it in her hand, and strap it on." - Nedra "Stickin Chicken" Bray
"I enjoy working under you. You're a good guy." - Hawk "Carpet Burn" Newton
"Blow Boy Blow!!" - Ryan, "I'm not that flexible!" - Hawk
"Dj'all all get some? Cuz there's more!" - Nedra "la Dulce Panadera" Bray
"It's not like I can do anything with it once I get it up" - Kurt "Missing the instruction manual" Mohr
"DRUGS TO YOUR DOOR!!! CHEAP!!" - Cobalt spam of the day 09/04/02
"I thought it was big, but I didnt think it was that big" - Bubba Grommet to Jay
Should I lick it first? - Lynne
"Sam are you coooming tonight" - Mike Grommet
"I'm a purist. That's a very pure hack." - Ed "OldHack" Graham
"Why don't you get a room and do what you have to do?" -- Chris Ritchie
"I saw Ryan playing with it." TeddBob in the Nitra huddle
"Start at the top, go to the bottom, follow the arrows on your way down" - Kurt "found the instruction manual" Mohr
"I had Deepaks nuts in my hand and he said I could give them back if I didn't want them" Lynne clarifying quote 694
"Lets tee up a meeting [shrug] [smirk] Meeting! I sound like a Bob" - Stefan
"You giving away the happy fun ball" Pat "funball" Ludwig
"Thanks for my happy fun ball." Critchie
"I wrote that system, I know it sucks." - Honest Sam
"I was suprised when that came up." - Mike 'Jack in the Box' Grommet
"I didn't know that angle was possible" - Surprised Nedra after Tedd demonstrated
"No, thanks. You don't taste good." - Kurt "Galloping Gourmet" Mohr to JP
"I WANT HEAD." - Anita "In The Mood" Tyler
I've tagged the head "branch" of Nitra as of 5:42-5:50pm PDT. The tag is PRE_SVCIFACE_HENDRICK_PUCKER. So if you want to use code (esp. the ears and wars that are fairly fresh) append the -r PRE_SVCIFACE_HENDRICK_PUCKER modifier to your update.
"We need to figure out how to get this thing up." Critchie
"I am not wearing heals, that is not going to happen" 'Fashionable' Jay G
"he should wear a chastity belt, he could take a cup off" Mikes marital advice to Julie Sohn
"Stefan Piesche: just bring some beer, if you want tp"
"Hey man, I can use a key board in a lot of ways" -Jason "Internet Pimp" DeLeau
"I'm still poking... something doesn't jive for me" Ken tsai
"I'm going to see if my thing is up." - Keith "FindNext" Burns
"More than just the balls need to be cleaned" JP to Nedra
"that makes it too long..." Ted chiming in
"Can you stuff those somewhere?" Critchie
"that's mean... and yet i laughed." julie s
"I got you with the Big Whopper" - Tori to Deepak
"I know! Sometimes I just have to stick my finger down there." - Elain Harman
"My cheeks aren't big enough." - John Holt
"We really want to do it with Axciom" - John Holt
"That would be great. Thanks" - Mike "Bill Lumberg" Hartzog
"You want me to get down on my hands and knees?" -Elaine, "Well you don't have to bend over, you can just stretch" -Mistress Tyler
"I was trying to retrieve Anita's blue squishy ball...
I was playing with it and it rolled under her desk, so she made me crawl around to find the damn thing." Elaine trying to clarify her last quote
"When it starts buzzing, I just go wild!" - Nedra's Mom (Apparantly there is a gene for Chili quotes)
"You chum the waters and then you hop out" - Rod Dunsmore about Stefan
"I'd do it in a pool sometime" - Jason Deleau
Rajan is rubbing himself vigorously! - John Holt in an exec meeting
"I don't even have it up." Mr. Dang
"What have I learned at Cobalt? Don't stick out" - Jedi Master mgrommet
She's gonna need some vasoline for that one - Needra, Context Unknown
"ClimberLyn: Wow! I didn't realize it was so long." - Lynne Medaugh
"...unless you tell me to drop my pants..." MohrKurt challenging Critchie
"It's a lotta work for a little piece of tail" - Cuong
"A good developer knows you have to suck QA" - Jay Gorrell
"I didn't hatch from an egg. I do have a mother!" - Angela Kudrick
"Someone go deep" - Chris Williams (5/9 baseball outing)
"I'll take a blow" - Chris Williams, chili quote master (same baseball game)
"I get a lot of balls out here" - Craig
"Phil Sims is gooooood" - someone at the ball game
"I've got three holes" - Mary (don't ask) Mohr
"Well Nedra's got 4 holes... uh, in her ear" - Jay (friends don't let friends get drunk and generate chili quotes)
"Keith, can you make a recommendation on where to stick it?" Critchie in command
"I have every confidence in your ability to leverage this opportunity for growth and exposure by putting it in the funnel and opening the faucet from womb to tomb. Don't leave any skunk on the table as you drive on the go-no-go decision process. Once you form your strawman perspective on the root cause of the issue, feel empowered to kick the tires then pull the trigger. Burning the boat sometimes requires a little peeling of the onion so grease the skids and bring it to market and don't let anyone sell you a hill full of jello along the way. Put it in you back pocket and make whatever hotdogs you can of it. You are the bridge monkey in this shin dig and we don't have much wiggle room so shuffle the deck and ignore the smell right out of the shoe." -- Critchie (speaking Bobbonics)
Someone's gotta Lead - Kurt "Bobba" McBride
"Tracey, get off your knees" - Cuong Nguyen
"I want to do something nasty with my wife tonight...." - Ed Graham
"What are you going to do, load balance me?" Unnamed-bob
"yikes! thanks kurt. that's what i meant. i'll send a revision. i'm a booger-eater." - jsohn
"I haven't had three in a row in a while" - Nedra
"Whats a bunghole?" - Rama (corruption has begun)
I'm not a real girl - Lynne
"I'm looking for a long one." - Keith Burns "You have to pull it some more." - Julie Sohn
Pucker announcement of the week: "Unplanned Production outage: Everything"
"nedrabray: yup, i'm a booger eater." - Yup, Nedra
"Kurt, your my kind of a**hole" Ed to kmohr admiringly
"If you play with it long enough you can get it to work." - Mark Moore
"Ok, Craig's going to get a spanking!" - MohrBobKurt the Tutor
"My hands are full, I had to use my head" - "Head-first "Critchie
my future may be predestined but it has yet to be revealed to me - guess who
"I think he wants you, Keith" - MMoore referring to Phil Dangit
"Nice long one!" bubba craig to jason
"Stop feeding it to me. I keep choking on it." - Jason Deleau
Derrick is poking at Katrina's chest!! - Alyson Sharron
"Stop by my desk later, I'll show them to you" - Nedra
Dont be a Deepak - Deepak
"Come on Jason, choke for me" -Tori
"Are these little balls edible?" - Craig Miller
"I'm into plastic" - Janelle
"If you get me a beer I'll drink for 5 minutes. If you show me where the beer is, I'll drink the whole day" - Dennis Chatham
"It's amazing what happens when you jump on it" - Nedra "Quote Generator" Bray
"I can only imagine the bad things I'm going to do to you..." - Critchie to kmohr
"I'll send your love by proxy" - Yup, Good Ole Critchie
"I just popped in for a quickie" - PhilBob Sims
"Thank god for wegie woman" (pronounced "wedgie woman") - JH
"Shoud I lick it first?" - Jay's Date
Mernie Ludwig: just a quickie. i'm a keepin' my fingers and toes crossed.
"we can toss each other off, and that will happen with or without a slide..." - Julie "toss and slide" Culin
"You look like a goat" - Jay to Tracey
"thats the dumbest stupid thing I think I ever heard" Rod to JP
"Going to be able to fit that in your mouth, big boy" - Kurt 'Big Daddy' McMouth
"This is further than I've been in a long time." - Tracey
"My hand is for your pleasure" - Part of Nedra's wedding vows to her very lucky husband
"backwardd4: Don't worry big boy, I will be coming for you soon enough;-)" - Steve Dallas
"Would you like to introduce your 'frog' to my 'Barney'" Ed to Rod and his frog
"Have you seen my...little squishy thing that helps me relieve my stress?" - JP
"I'm the dog on the end of the leash" - Jason
"I got tired of doing Dilbert" - Dennis Chatham
"I want a labatomy" - Stefan
"you should see the size of my zucchini...it's HUGE" - Phil Dang
"Oh.. I'm pulling on your thingy." - Stefan to Rod/Larry/Todd
"Why does it keep going up like that?" - Jason Dorkleau
"A longer one would have been better Ted, it's easier to get a grip on it" - Jenny Douglass
"Ed! You're mine!" - Stefan
"It's up but it's not working..." -the team of Lynne and Deepak
"... I put my finger in there and with my other hand I couldn't reach the nut then I moved my other shoulder underneath me and had oil all over the place" - Hawk describing how he "helped" his roommate.
"You can't deny a man his frog..." -- Eduardo
That is .duh ahhhhhhhhhhh aeeeeehhhhhh ummmmmmmmm .....yes...........ehhhhhhhhhhh. thank you. - Rod "ummmmm" Dunsmore
"Don and Anita want Ed!" Mark 'the pimp' moore
"If the floor was sticky, too bad!" - Kurt Mohr explaining the wet spot on his pants, he then clarified, "Did I say I was in there with Julie?"
"Have you banged on your thingie?" Don Taylor to Lee Davis
"I didn't ask the size (of the coolers) " - Jenelle speaking cautiously in front of McMouth
"Some tool expertise. " Cobalt job posting requirement
"eharman0: oh please, you can't just dangle that in front of my face and then not let me see it." Elaine to Kurt McTease
"I've got lots of new stuff I want to play with" recently married nedra
"[dancing] It's time for the beef!" Jenelle (on the way out the door to go on a date)
"Do you like head cheese?" - Erin Roach
"The worst part about having it in your pocket is that it gets soft." Hawk
"Mine itches and I don't even have a rash" Nedra "itchy" Bray
"Why is yours smaller than mine?" Julie Sohn Malmstrom to Tedd
"Pass it around, we can all suck on it" - Anita after 1.25 beers
"I want to make sure I understand it before I try to fix it." - Jason the psychic
"Hang around a while and I'll do you next." - critchie "The Do-er"
"Where's Daniel's package?" - Jenelle Cimino
"I'm not touching that one, you're on your own" - Tedd, declining to help Jay
"That's not the hole I was going for... bonus!" - Pat Ludwig
"I have this thing, it looks really pretty, and then you try to chop it up!" Mike 'Bobbit'
"I'd love to put some lipstick on that pig" - Farm lovin Grommet
"Wanna try something funky? It's the other end." - Yeah, Nedra
"We can negotiate price later..." - Eric to "his little buddy" mgrommet
"I've done lawyers before" - Janelle
Afterwards, I just sat there limp. -- Ed
"You can whack it whenever you want to whack it." -- Dennis "Mr. IT" Thomas to Keith Burns
"I am freaked out\n" - Deepak
"Come on, get it up Dennis" - Tori
"..Howard is capable of drinking continuously from a very large hose" --Rajan
"Look what I can do! Again and again and again!!" - Nedra the Show-off
What would Grommet do for a million Dollars? - anonymous
"Ouch! It poked me in the butt" - Jason DeLeau
"That is one attractive banana you have." Lynne to Stan
"It looks ok on the inside." Stan's response
"It's more digestible that way." Alan's input
"Kurt - Your first assignment under me..." Julie C to McBob
"There are way too many defects" - Jason "Defect Boy" Deleau
"...and it displayed the message: 'The requested URL /AutoDownload/AutoDownload_fr_CA.cgi was not found on this server.' I'm screwed. Can't test in French." - Description of one of the first defects Stan entered
"I blinked and you scored" - Nedra to Ted "Minute-Man" Douglass
"Take it out! I'm right in front of you" - Deepak to someone
"No worries, thats what Bobs are for, helping the real workers do what they do best." Kurt McBob-a-lot
"How many people have put their mouths on this tube?" - Nedra
"How big is it supposed to blow up?" - Nedra
"That's a really big balloon you have!" - Stan to Cuong
"I think he just can't keep it up very well" - Stan
My code doesn't give any unexpected runtime errors - Nary "perfect coder" Birakaybobla
I need to bring up my outlook so I can check my females - DePimp
"I'll plug you baby" - Julie C. to Chris
"Whatever part works is the part that's supposed to work." - Jason "stop opening defects even if my code is broken" Deleau
"I'm all about the boys." kurt mcbubba
"Its fun to do it with you, sweetie" -- Deepak, whispering sweet nothings in Jason's ear.
"You're balloon is going down" - Nedra to Cuong
"There's a big knot in it. I might have to work it out." - Cuong's reply
"I even have balls!" - Stan exclaims!
"There are 10 types of people; those that understand binary and those that don't" - random emainl signature
"Lynne, have you seen my problem?" -jason
"You're the boss!" - Mikey to Phil Dang, "I'm the discarded gum on the shoe of the boss." - Phil
Mike G to Eric - "Just keep on suckin!"
"I know one sure fire way to get it to pop up." - KurtMohr the Experienced
"If I wasn't such a moron, maybe it would've worked". Jason "mr honest" Deleau
"We could do that! Get a sheep in here!" - Phil "Can Do" Dang
"We've got an hour. It will be hard to get it in." Critchie
"I have to touch your pants" - Stan to Cuong
"Dude you're going to leave skid marks on the table!" - mgrommet to jgorrell, context withheld
"you might have to come down if I don't come up" - MohrBob
"Looking at Chris makes me not want to get married" - Jenelle
"Agile? We're agile like a tarpit!" - Hawk
"I'm out of beer, so I'm out of interest..." - critchie, leaving the room
"Thank you for sucking" Eric smiling at Ted
"Oh God!!!" - Nedra, "Her legs were in the air and I saw an opportunity" - Kurt Mohr
"My guys were in the air and kurt took the shot and scored big." - Nedra trying to justify Kurt
"We need to bang on them without mercy." VP Howard saying how it is
jason is a 3F?? - message from Jason Deleau in cvs log.
"It keeps falling out, I'm sorry Phil" Julie to Phil Bob
"Not without invoking Moses" Bruce's reply to whether a dealer can go back to LM 2.9 after migrating to LM 3.0
"I'm better in the back." Angela
"I can't eat something that big" - Nedra
"Want to see my tail?" - Angela to Chris
"Sev 1 Pri 1?!? Can he lick my balls?" Pats reaction to a nice email thread
"Mebe you should blow on it before you eat it" - Nedra's hubby, Trey (see #877)
"Hey phil, I need someone to be my asshole" Mark Moore to PDang
"I took my phone to bed with me last night" - Mark Moore
"I either lost it, or I took it off" - Nedra
"Didn't have any batteries last night, so I didn't get to play with it" - Nedra, when asked about her birthday present
Just put it in your mouth and like it!!! - Elaine "Romance" Harman
"That was right after the sexual orientation" Hawk
"Do I want to trade my 21 inch for a 17 inch?" Pondering Kurt Mohr
"I can take 3, more if they hop in the bed." Kurt Mohr
"It's pretty bad when you have to rely on other people's failure to be successful." - Phil-bob
"Yup, it's up, yea!" Stan
"I have to whip it out in like an hour or so..." - Beth Burks
"I was going to do it with Phil... We were going to do it between 11:30 and 12:30..." - Overheard by Nedra conversing in hallway..
"Where we stick it won't matter" Craig
"I'm easy, I'll do whatever you want." Charlyn
"I do not have any whale sperm pills, thank you" Mike Grominator
"He seems like such a supreme turd" - Valerie
"1 of the things I enjoy about my job, shoving things down other people's throat" - Kurt "The Pusher" Mohr
"So how old is old enough?" - Kurt NAMBLA Mohr
"Stick it in there and come back!" - Karate Culin to Mr. Dang
"I FARTED. It smells like burnt toast." - Jenelle (Stinky) Cimino
"You can look at it. You can stare at it. You can comment on it, compliment it, but you CANNOT touch it!" - Phil "Rules" Dang to Valerie
"I sleep with a UNIX book every night .. a living, breathing UNIX book. " -- Sonie John
"While I try to be very flexible, a human pretzel, I am not!" Ben Dover Grommet
"I'd met him before with clothes on." Lynne's b-day quote
"Probe them deeper" - Mark Moore
"I like to poke every once in awhile." Critchie
"Pokin's good." Mark McNeal
I'll be touching you guys in various ways I'm sure. -- Chris Ritchie
"First we need to see it!" Valarie to Keith
"I don't want to play with it, I just want to eat it!" Kurt McBride
"can you shove it in there?" McBride to Nedra 'the stuffer'
"I can't wait for it to explode!!!" Nedra the expert
"I was involved. I have a solution, it just won't work." Darwin
"I liked your woody" Darwin to Hawk referring to the Woody character from Toy Story
"I'm holding wood. Don't worry." - Rajan
"It's not that big." Derrick
"We can't do it here." Derrick continues
"What the hell's an updog?" Critchie
"good luck, that thing hasn't been touched in a long time!" Kurt McBob
"He can play with it, but tell him not to use it" Mark Moore
"I was puttin' my lips on the inside of the thang." - critchie
"You just want to put your face in it and suck" Ed, the sucker
"If you have a little thing thats driving you crazy..." Val to Phil Dang... who knows.
"We're getting tired of keeping it up" Jay, the old fart, Gorrell
"did YOU get a piece?!?" a surprised Nedra to Kurt
"I'm a bottoms up kind of guy." Stan
"I've got the Tool !" - Ed
"Spank It" - Glenn Carnagey
"I've tried that and it doesn't work" - Matt Semar
"I dont know how to insert one!" Mr. Dorkleau
I'm a monkey - Lynne "TestMonkey" Meddaugh
"The lights are much brighter there. You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares. So go downtown, things'll be great when you're - Downtown - no finer place, for sure. Downtown - everything's waiting for you" - Sung by Rajan during Nitra 2.0 deployment
"I was watching Dennis play with it and its looking good! - Chris Ritchie
"Moisten me often in a semi-sunny location" - Trey's Boss
"I'd rather do it on Sunday prior to the Super Bowl..." Derrick
"What day is it? Monday or Tuesday?" - overhearing Deepak in the kitchen asking another developer for some reference. - 'No, it is still Sunday Deepak!' :)
"This will allow us the flexibility to put it where we want." /\/\ /\/\
"It might have gone in even if you didn't touch it." Tedd
"My thingy just went kaput." - Stan
"He'll definitely inspect and go deeper in softer areas." Mark McNeal
"Lick it, its all edible!" Nedra to Hawk... dont ask, dont tell
"Nedra helped me put my heart on!" - Stan "Cupid" Taylor
"We don't have that kind of relationship with Stan or Eric" - Alan; "That's cause they don't have a couch." - Jason in response
"Most people who grind, grind in the back." - Stan
"So, you like asses? Cool!" Eric to Ted with a big smile :-)
"I just utilized your a$$" Eric 'the user' to Jay
"Nedra has no meat!" amazed Grominator
"I baked a cheeze cake in my pantz last night" Chef Nedra
"Its savory, not sweet!" Nedra strikes again
"that really doesn't work without the hand motions" the seattle chili quote queen - eharman
"...after the pleasure I received from it, I had to laugh!" -MohrBob, in response
"We're playing for double ass" -- Deepak during a game of ...
"she screamed before it went in!" Kurt about Nedras yelp
"I screamed because I knew it was going in!" Nedra attempting to justify her reaction
"I'm just sucking, ted." Nedra with authority
"I don't have to pee, I'm just dancing!" - Carla
Remember the time I beat the tree? - Kurt Mohr grinning as he asks Ted
"I got my balls right here!" Ed to Hawk
"Forget Head!" - Ed to Steve Nesbitt
"its small, I'm blind... not a good combination" Jimmy J
"When I whack on something real hard" - Ed
"I like my privates... " serious Jay
"Do they have balls at the pier?" Angela Kudrick, Asst Chili Quote Generator
"I'll do everyone in the office for a buck a minute" - Jenelle
"You can do it from the back side" Critchie
"Well... better the pisser than the pissee." jimmy j
"She was down when I was coming up" - Jorge DeCardenas
eharman0: ok I did me.
"it's just so hard to get wasted on a Monday night... it's like blowing yer wad before she even gets her clothes off." - Trey "Minute-Man" Kirk
"Damn - I thought I was getting lucky!" -- MohrBob to Jorge the BA
"Gotta get it up by 3:00" Mark McBully
"It felt good, even though I didn't score" - Nedra
"That sounds like a good approach, but I don't know what needs to be inserted or where to insert it. " - Randy Smith
"Apparently, I have no idea" jimmy 'good thing I am an advisory'
"I'm licking this one up" - Nedra
"It would be very beneficial to me to have somebody else whacking on it" Ed G-man
"I figured I'd squeeze it an see what happens" Grommet
"(*pop* as I pull it out of my butt) bugs" - grominator
"They got tired of me and Steve doing it under the covers..." Ed Graham
"I'm gonna suck it all off the top." -Erin Riggers
eharman0 (5:21:44 PM): what are you doing with your mouth??
"The 'A' means you get head." - Ted 'Back to School' Douglass
"just because you extend it, doesn't mean that you can tough it" gromination
"Do you want to borrow my wife?" - Trey to Pat
"you can straddle that" cbeams to eharman
"would that make you happy?" eharman responding
"I'm glad I got my hand in my pocket" - Kurt 'I did it all by Myself' Mohr
"I can't believe how many huntin peckers there are around here!" Nedra... dont ask
"I used an 8 incher on a multi user..." Ed - the master!
"That was my Cooter impression" - Nedra
"I was thinking about Cooter" - Nedra (while explaining the Cooter impression comment to Trey)
"I tend to procrastinate on things that bring so little value to my life." Bobified
"I could dip my pickle in it" - Trey
"there is not a lot of room, that thing keeps going up my butt!" Janelle to Jay
"Was working and didn't notice it wasn't up" - Heath Malmstrom
"It slipped through my cracks..." - Thomas Holkenbrink
"Let me touch it once or twice." - Craig Miller referring to one of the balls...
" Am I going to have to beat myself?" - Doug, Trey's officemate
[10:49:29] kmohrcblt: the alpha nerd raised me to her level
[10:49:47] kmohrcblt: :-*
eharman0 (5:51:30 PM): I like the easy ones.
eharman0 (5:52:58 PM): well at least I didn't misspell "like" as "lick"....
"Play with daddy's balls!" - could only be Nedra
'We just get it for 69' Janelle
"How often do your desires come true?" Brian Worsham to Kurt Mohr
"When you are 6 foot three, every inch counts" Kurt "More"
Oh, hey, I do have one of those down there -- Kurt, on a roll in Seattle, referring to 1007?
"You are gay." -- Cobalt Spam of the Day
"Its like a toy, it wakes up when you touch it" Mary
"I'm excited! I'm excited! Now score already!!" - Shannon Belletti to her partner Jon
"Get it off!! Smack it!! Score Already!!" - Shannon Belletti (15 seconds later)
"I have to admit, I do like the sound of rotating..." Mike Grommet
"Maybe you and I can do a quick one on Friday before you go" Kurt Mohr
"You need any help getting around the backside there?" - Phil Sims
hehehe, here comes guys - MouthBot
Stefan: "How big is yours?" Ed: "I normally don't answer personel questions like that, but 3384."
"Show me a BIG one." - Jenelle while looking at www.viagra.com
"I am on my knees, humbly" - John W. P. Holt, CEO
"I'm leaking all over myself!" - Bryan Reed
"You seem to be latching on to my thing there!." - Chris to Howard
nedrabray (5:03:10 PM): no, i'm need to changed and head out to run.
"everyone grab some wood" - RK CTO
"Does it feel big ... Jeff's feels big" - Angela (regarding Nedra's recent purchase)
"If we could spontaneously code things, we wouldn't get done in time!" - Craig Robinson
"I'm a gril. I suck!" - Jenelle
"Not only am I wet, but now I'm wet and sticky!" - Mike "Don't Touch Me" Grommet
"Do you need a guy following behind you with vaseline?" -- Trey to his wif
"Unlike you, I have experience keeping liquid in my mouth" - Jen Canales
"I usually don't have it up..." - Ed Graham the IM man
"They can't use tails as fast as I can." - Ed 'quicky' Graham
"I was surprised it went down so quickly and easily." You know who - Nedra
"It's old and exposed." Craig
"I've gone down too, but you're going down first." Deepak to Lynne
"I didn't realize I was in a hole already." Deepak continues
"Ed got some recently." She's back - Nedra
"Deepak has a cute little one." Tracey "it's about time she got another quote after 4 years" Almrud
"The meat is going inside, and it's going to be cooked" - Deepak
"It feels good inside." - Deepak again
"Stay away from my butt! I'll put my feet in the air!" - Shannon Belletti
"Biopersisted Deepokumentation" - Chris 'the dictionary' Ritchie
ok, i'm gonna go look at your BOD - Craig to Lynne
You want some wood? - GWB
'We found a real easy way to get it up' - Long live the Queen!
"Give me long... I will take long anytime." - Eric 'asking for it' Lai
"Trey, show your dad your package." - Nedra, of course
'I saw the hole and I got excited!' - Rick Grashel's First
"I would cut her off..." - Chris 'do not pass go' Ritchie
"My wife plays wow with me and always wants me to play with her when I get home" - Jason 'gone but not forgotten' Deleau
"I think that Haneef should have taken Craig up on his offer to foam him up again" - Rick 'wash it again' Grashel
"as long as it's dry, I don't care if I'm inside or out" - Trey Kirk
"Failing to fear, is more important that fearing to fail" - ADT Magazine
"You might not want your coworkers to see it, but you can do it at work!" - Horny Trey
This is the type of people Trey has to work with - [16:03] <MatHamlin> my poop is weird
'If I keep playing with it, the battery will run out' - Jay's Birthday Quote
"I just got a little tool...." - Trey
'On that day we would like you to bring something red or pink to share with your co-workers (it has to be edible).' - Jenelle 'Happy Valentines Day' Cimino
"It's the finger in the crack, the leaky crack." Crackboy Cuong
"Just because you pee on it doesn't mean it's yours" - Cuong 'I think that's mine' Nguyen
Screw it, I'll pollinate them myself! - Jeannette "Wasp Terminator" Day
"People don't need it like I do." - Lynne M. 3/29/05
"I have to suck up whenever I get the opportunity" - Lynne M, again on 3/29/05
"They want deep integration" - Rajiv 'hit them where it hurts' Rawal
"I used to poke her on that sometimes" Craig about an unnamed co-worker
"How'd you get it in there?" -Nedra (of course) 6/17/05
My thing leaks! - Stephan Hopper
"I haven't pulled it out yet!" Thomas "the search" Holkenbrink
"Why does it always come too small?" Lynne "I need it bigger" Meddaugh
Alright I got technical difficulties. My thing is droopy. How do you make it stand up? - Shopper
"You're playing with mine, and I'm playing with yours" - Pratik 'I want mine back' Shah
"you put it where I need it, thanks" - Aaron Rice
Sit down so I can give you some - Stephan to Hawk
"I like to go all the way" - Stephen H
"I offered myself to you already! Sheesh!" -Lynne 11/1/2005
"it has to go up and down like this" - Pratik 'let me show you how its done' Shah
"It gets stiff when I hold it up." - Lynne to Jay
"Why can't we have good coffee. Its supposed to be Starbucks, but it tastes like my ass" - Hawk
"When will you come play with me?" - Critchie to Ricky
"I wanna come see your thing - Critchie to Angelo
"I go for the hard stuff" - Lynne "let me have it" Meddaugh
"It's got two screws, so you could just do it." Tedd
"Pleeeease don't pull out" - Nedra 12/7/05
"Wow, that got big!" - Nedra
"You won't put that in there" - Nedra, again
"I'd stick my head under it, put my tounge on it and go lal-lal-lal-lal" - Nedra. Long live the Queen!
"You'll have to show it to me when we get back to the office" - Nedra to James
Next I'll start licking it. - Lynne
"I'd like to describe this little thing down here." - Michael Rice
"Leave the bone in" - Kendra Herring
"Come get a hummer" - Hawk "Ad-man" Newton (11/3/06)
"Squirt, squirt, squirt, squirt, shake" - John Holt
"Deeper penetration, that's what matters most to us" - John Holt
"They would take their balls and play elsewhere" - Taken from a Seattle Times article
'it handles the big ones like a dream' - onetrueping
"Oh look, I can still put things in that hole!" - Nedra
"I'll keep looking online for something else warm and cheap and easy" - Michelle Hempel
"May not necessarily be comfortable, but it won�t be long" - Chris Mills
"Suck faster!!" - Ted Douglass to Doug Z.
"I think I need to play with that tool" - Matt Reichert
"Use the left hand! USE THE LEFT HAND DAMMIT" - Frustrated Trey
Trey Kirk used to be cool. Now he's just lame.
"I have a long one, so I'm told" - Seattle Matt (withholding his last name)
"You don't have to hold it in front of your mouth if you can put it in" - Michael Rice
"I suck and suck and suck and nothing comes out, then it all comes out at once" - Trey
"I am soooo not getting laid tonight" - Drunk Trey
"Did she get rid of the Cox?" - Holly in reply to a question about someone's name that is no longer hyphenated
"Why do they do it so fast and hard?" - Matt R
'I've played with it, it looks like its working just fine." - bkreed
"Mine doesn't go in and out, it goes back and forth!" - Mark Lehman
"Sorry for the incontinence" - Andy Helge
"Cool, they're having Valentine's Day and Friday the thirteenth on the same day this year" - Heath the clueless
"I just play with it for about 20 minutes" - Clayton
"Jon's over here having a sexual experience with your brown-bag" - mpullen
"You were talking about your big ugly hairy ones, right? - Jim Norman
"Yesterday, I told David to prioritize my crap" - Aaron "TaskMaster" Reeder
"I was torn between flailing around wildly and doing it right" - Shannon Belletti
I did it it 4 minutes flat! So, you owe me a ding dong. ;-) -- From the over excited QA department
"C'mon, yer just jealous you don't have a two headed snake" - Trey
"I've done the guys downstairs" - Matt
"it's been rubbing a little raw where it rests on the edge of the desk" - KinkyNearBeer
"I took a city that was known for pornography, and licked it, to a large extent." - Rudy Guliani
"The balls are good" Trey Kirk
"I suck and I'll only get worse" - Jeremy "The Mouth" Barras
"I am getting early morning dump from Star Team." - Anonymous
If you can't run with them, then get out of the gym
"I do", Jenelle Semar (n� Cimino)
"So you don't like it when it's long?" Regis to Will
"Let me know when I can shoot off...or let me know when its gonna shoot off in my face" - Trey "Shooter/Shootee" Kirk
Well, you don't see other people jerking it off, do ya? - Nedra's dad (I see a pattern here)
"Did you run out of places to put it." - Trey
"I don't like the penis waving behind my back" - Jon
"This hand does everything you want, I promise" - Kayla
The anger makes you empty. -- Brian Bopp
"Did you get it all in? No, there's still white stuff on my arm" - Chandra
"Whatever I can get, I want some more!" - Trey "never satisfied" Kirk
"It's Jay's fault. He made me play with it." Innocent Trey Kirk
I can get on top of all of them and beat them - Kayla
"I bet I can play with it enough to make it work" - Kayla Johnson
I am a Chunk Spelunker! What is that? It's someone that digs around icecream to get the chunky pieces. What if I dig for the icecream? Then you are a Cream Spelunker. -Chris R
I wear entire parties out - Kayla
I like it most in my eye - Trey
Reach over and slap it on the counter so everybody can reach it - Trey
If i'm going to suck, I mine as well suck and like it. -Jon
"push 'em out and pull 'em in"- D. Bishop
"You gotta scratch where it itches, not where it looks good" - D. Bishop

Maintained by Pat Ludwig